Southern Born and Bred

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HEY Y’ALL, Hope ya’ Momma en ’em are having a good day!! Let’s take a bit of time to reflect on this glorious lifestyle we call being Southern. First and foremost, a true southerner respects everyone. I have nothing against our northern and western friends…in fact, I love some of you transplants like family! (And you know some of y’all have adopted some of our southern ways, ADMIT IT!)

THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BEING SOUTHERN AND A REDNECK! (Which there is also nothing wrong with…I love people!!!) And honestly, at times they intersect. ๐Ÿ™‚ (I think that’s enough to keep any lawyers off my back….bwahaha! xoxo)

**DISCLAIMER** I will openly admit that I may or may not adhere to these southern qualities at times…or ever. But hey, this is a judgment free zone people!**

SOUTHERNERS

  • We call our parents Momma and Daddy.
  • Grandparents are called Pawpaw and Mawmaw….or very similar variations
  • Many are known to their siblings as Sissy and Bubba (I call Bentley or any little tyke Bubba so it’s totally interchangeable ๐Ÿ˜‰ )
  • We use ma’am and sir…out of respect for everyone, not only due to age.
  • Manners are taught from the time you are able to talk.
  • We use Y’all! Do I even need to explain this one?! Sheesh, I used it earlier!
  • We are loyal to a fault. Just listen to Ain’t No Mountain High Enough.
  • Church is on Wednesday nights and Sundays. Wednesday is supper night…Speaking of, supper is what the last meal of the day is called down here.
  • We pull over for funeral processions. Period. It’s respectful!
  • Living together before the wedding and having premarital sex is a major sin. But…well…times are a changin’ so why don’t we just move on, shall we?
  • Speaking of the above, we still ALWAYS wear white when we get married. Duh.
  • EVERY gathering must have pie!…or cobbler (cherry pie, blueberry pie, apple pie, chicken pie, Oreo pie, fish stick pie…ok, I don’t think that exists but if for some ungodly reason it does, just go ahead and stop making it. Just stop. Gross.)
  • We drink SWEET TEA…and by that I mean at least a cup or 2 of sugar and not using that artificial sweetener after the weird, non sweetened tea is brewed. (ok, ok, sometimes I do…but hey I’m ADD…do we reaaallllyyy want to give me more sugar?!)
  • We will always offer you or take you up on your offer of having some moonshine. (*This is what I mean between being southern and redneck…sometimes they can start to intertwine.*) DISCLAIMER: If moonshine is still illegal then just go ahead and chalk this sentence up to me hearing a tall tale and proclaim i’ve never seen it, don’t know anyone who drinks it, and I certainly have never partaken in any myself. (I honestly just don’t even feel like going on the internet and tracking these laws down….sooooo to my sweet police and district attorney friends…if it is then can you just skip this part. Thankyouverymuch. Otherwise, I highly recommend trying some apple moonshine in your lifetime.
  • Macaroni & Cheese is a legitimate VEGETABLE. Period.
  • We fry up all kinds of food…or will at at least try
  • We eat biscuits and gravy…Homemade. Or at least check out Bojangles. For real. (Also, I was in Miami one time and when someone in our group tried to order biscuits and gravy they asked what gravy was. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! Traumatizing!)
  • After dinner we catch lightening bugs in the summer.
  • Bonfires are a must. All four seasons is bonfire season. It truly is a right of passage.
  • We use cozies for our beverages. I personally carry one in my purse. But hey, to each their own.
  • If you’re not early, you’re late.
  • “Bless your heart” is used on a daily basis. More hearts are blessed in the south than anywhere else. It can be used in many different scenarios…..which brings me to…
  • If you hear any southerner say “Son of a gun,” “Son of a biscuit,” “Fudge” “Shut ya’ mouth,” “Fiddlesticks,” “Well slap ya’ Momma,” “Shoot fire” or any version of the kind it isn’t good. In fact, those are pretty much the curse words of the south and in some situations it may be better to just turn and walk the other way.
  • We smile sweetly at everyone. You could be a serial killer but if you’re walking the streets in the south then you will gets smiles. (Which now that I think about it kind of scares me and I don’t want to turn into serial killer bait so maybe I should stop smiling at people. Alright, I’m only going to smile at you if I know you. And only then if I know for a fact that you aren’t a serial killer. Just for safe measure and all)
  • If you don’t know what a doohickey or a thingamajig is, then you are actually fitting right in…because neither do we.
  • A true southern ladyย (lady being used lightly here…I mean dagnabit, we can’t all be perfect) will always have at least one of the following…if not all (and in multiple sizes and colors)…Pearls, High Heels, and Monogrammed…well…everything.
  • Add “dagnabit” to the curse words by the way.
  • Friday nights are for high school football games and Saturday’s were made for college football. It’s not just a game folks, it’s a religion. That we thank God for of course.
  • You ALWAYS have a college football team that you are a die hard fan of and cheer for through the good times and bad.
  • You or some of your kin folk owns a truck and/or a “work truck”
  • We own and carry guns…the majority of us. And are never afraid to use them. Bless your stupid little criminal hearts. ohhh, and boyfriends… watch those Daddy’s and for the love of God, have their babies home by curfew!
  • Duck tape is a tool. It can be found in any toolbox. Just go ahead and let that sink in and you will fit in just fine around these parts.

And last but not least, If you do not know the lyrics to Sweet Home Alabama, Devil Went Down to Georgia, and The Night that the Lights Went Out in Georgia then you better thank your lucky stars that it isn’t mandatory to know them in order to get into…well…anywhere down south.ย Learn them. Embrace them. Love them!

There are many others, and for goodness sake if I left one out please be sure to leave me a comment to add to this list…I don’t want people thinking I’m a northerner or westerner in disguise!

Love, hugs, kisses, and bright pink glitter for now,

Kimmy G ๐Ÿ™‚

P.S. Again, I refuse to re-read this so it comes with a guarantee of grammar and spelling mistakes. Youโ€™re welcome y’all!

 

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